The photo above was taken after the Splash n Dash. Suzanne and Peter did great and I floundered. Let me tell you my story.
I'm scared of the open water swim but I want to get better. Thursday we had a race where we had 500m swim and a 2.5 mile run. I was SOOO nervous. Not only did I have to swim in Tempe Town Lake but it was also going to be my first swim in a wet suit. My fears started to escalate the night before the race when I tried the wet suit on. It fit better than it did when I first got it but it was still a size or two too tight. My husband said "it will look great when you lose about 20 more pounds". Whatever. Mom said, "are you really going to wear that tomorrow?" Whatever again.
I was extra nervous on Race day - should I even wear the wetsuit? I never knew I so vain until these damn triathlons. I spoke to my tri buddies (Peter and Suzanne) they both encouraged me to wear it just to test it out. They were very supportive. If I try to wear it, at least I will know how it feels to float. This was my first Splash n Dash. You could do a 500 or 1000m swim. We got signed up and were stunned by the crowd. There were only about 150 people. The last race we did there were about 1500 people of all shapes and sizes. The 150 people doing the Splash n Dash were all "super duper fit". They all must have been training for the SOMA HIM or the IM-AZ. I think there was only 1 woman heavier than me and I only saw 1 man with a beer belly. INTIMIDATING! These people had the type of bodies where they walk around in their speedos or their tri bikinis. The Suzanne said "I hope I look like that when I am 40! I've got 15 more years to get there!" Yes, I am training with a 25 year old.
I decided I was going to power through though and do this. Who cares what anyone thinks. At least I am trying. I got my wetsuit on easier than I thought I would. It was ok. The 1000m people went first and we took off about 3 minutes later. (I knew one person in the 1000m group.) There were only 13 of us doing the 500. When I got in the water I was stoked. I didn't even have to tread! The suit floated for me. I was very optimistic. I could really float! I wasn't going to sink!! HOORAY!
So our 500m horn went off and I took of swimming like a champ. My swim coach was right! I can do this! Mind over matter. I had my head in the water breathing ever 3rd stroke. I realized that when I actually do my stroke correctly I can cover a lot of ground! Then it happened . . . I looked up to sight and freaked. I started to lose my breath. I flipped to my back and tried to get my heart rate down. I back stroked then rolled to my front again. Can't seem to get my groove back. Oh no! It was a triangle bouy set up. 1000m folks did 2 laps and we did 1 lap. In the middle of the first and second bouy, I called the lifeguard boat over and told him to pull me in. I was having a panic attack. I lost my breath and was freaked out. He said "do you really want me to take you back?" I said "Yep! I can't do this." I held onto the boat and tried to catch my breath but he couldn't go anywhere b/c there were swimmers going by. I then thought I had to keep going so I let go of his boat and took off again. Same thing all the way back. Stroke and covered a lot of ground and then flipped to my back. Stroked and covered ground and flipped to my back again. Awful!
I finally reached the finish line and got out. My friend from the 1000 got out the same time I did. (Yes, he lapped me.) At first I could tell he was proud that he lapped me but then he must have seen the defeated the look on my face. He tried to cheer me on and helped unzip my wetsuit. I got to the transition and told myself i was done. I quit. I'm not going to do the run. Then I thought, what am I going to tell my kids! I can't tell them I quit. So I got on my shoes and ran. Plus, I knew I had to get a couple more miles in for the pumpkins. I ran and I finished the race. Many of the 1000 m people passed me on teh run but they were superhuman triathlon people so I didn't care. I almost started crying about 3 times but sucked it up. My two tri buddies were waiting for me at the finish line. They were so cute. They tried to make me feel better but it didn't help much. Peter said I was in a "triathlon death spiral". They said it was all in my head and I just needed to keep at it. I know they are right.
On the way home I called my man. He tried to pump me up. He said he would take me to do more OWS and support me getting a swim coach. it was nice but I was too down to appreciate it. By the time I got home i had given myself a migrane. I put the kids to bed and then put myself to bed b/c my headache was so bad I couldn't see. I've only had 2 other migranes in my life - both when I was pregnant.
The cute thing is that Peter called this morning and said "guess what!? All 3 of us won our age groups!" (13 people remember) He also told me I wasn't last. I finished 12/13. I think I must have passed someone on the run.
So now I am dreading next Friday's 1000m Splash n Dash. (no 500m option this time) Peter and I are also doing a tri next Sunday. This wasn't on my radar but Peter wants to do it. It has and 750m OWS. The next week another tri with a 1000m OWS. I know the OWS practice is what I need but I'm just sick about it.
What am I going to do?! If I can't even swim a 500m how am I going to do my HIM swim??
No comments:
Post a Comment